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IC/Cancer:Two Sides of the Same Coin

12/4/2011

 
As with most things with life age and circumstances can knock us to our knees and show us a completely different view of a situation, a belief or and idea that we felt so sure about years prior.  Unable to have the knowledge and understanding of a diagnosis of an incurable condition such as cancer I strove to shed some light on the extreme pain, loneliness, depression and isolation that accompanies someone diagnosed with a chronic pain disease.  Initially I was hoping for the same level of research, insight, empathy as I lost six years to the pain and loneliness lived with IC but I realize that comparing IC or any other chronic pain disease to a terminal disease is like trying to compare pine cones to calligraphy pens.  Simply stated a terminal disease and a life-sentence of a painful chronic condition are two sides of the same coin, where with one your pain and immortality slips by more quickly but you would give anything for one more day, month, year to live in spite of the pain whereas a lifetime of suffering pain causes you to measure each moment more slowly waiting for the years to go more quickly so you can pass away into painlessness.  Like the edge of a coin pain and immortality blur and are so closely linked it is hard to separate the one from the other.  The cancer patient seeks time and for the remainder of their days to be as painless as possible.  The IC patient seeks compassion and for also for the remainder of their days (years) to be as painless as possible.  In this sense the two are similar yet oh so different.

Recently I have been with a close family member suffering from cancer and journeying closer and closer to a final chapter in her life, I feel a sense of joy and sadness as well as both an emptiness and a fullness about life.  I cannot understand the pain of her cancer but I can understand how the pain in her body can sometimes supersede the actions of the world at large. Gazing into her eyes I am reminded of my own immortality and a sense that my mission to help others suffering, either from IC or cancer is a gift both priceless and filled with pain.  Suffering, whether over the course of months as a cancer patient or over a lifetime as a chronic pain sufferer, can never be easy but if we surround them with our presence and unconditional love then we can gently carry part of their burden of suffering.  In this small way I am learning to be an advocate of both those suffering from chronic pain diseases as well as cancer instead of trying to point out the differences.  As the Buddhists say, "Life is suffering with brief moments of joy."  Try to be the joy in someone's suffering.

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