I would often question my fiance's wish to stay with me and sometimes thought that my IC would not be so hard to bear if someone who had known and loved me when my physical and sexual health was at its best did not have to see the pain, despair and depression in my face every single day. We lived in the same physical space but lived in separate emotional spaces. Empathetic and shocked by the changes in our relationship. We cooked and ate and slept separately for many years. It is a hard place to be, in love yet separated by pain.
The love that flows through me to my fiance (and vice versa) after making it through the darkest moments of IC is immeasurable. There is a clarity and a joy that other seemingly difficult times together does not touch. We have made it through IC. We can make it through anything our hand holding says. Meals now shared together are a communion between two souls that were once kept hungry by sadness and separate meals.
This post is for you, my love. Thank you for sticking with me through the dark times. Your blue eyes and your steadfast love have been my constant guiding star.